Monday, October 31, 2005


Couple 'o pics from Rocky Raccoon. Don't laugh at how bad I look, I'm finishing up a 31 mile trail run in these photos.


My home computer is currently away and I don't have much time at work, so this'll be short. More regular postings once I get my internet access back.

The Burnet Road Challenge was a blast. Over 50 people showed up, many non-hashers who I have never seen before. Had fun, got thrown out of Lala's, cut off at Ginny's, and who knows what else. Probably do this again next year.

The Monte show was alright. He did the entire show on an electric guitar, I've never seen that. I don't think he sounds as good on an electric as opposed to his usual acoustic guitar. Hopefully the electric thing doesn't last. His second set was much, much better than the first though, wonder if that had anything to do with Monte drinking a lot of tequila? And if anyone ever sees Lewis & Cock's kids, ask them what a dildo is. Trojan was nice enough to pique their curiosity.

Ended up haring on Sunday. UZM called me on Friday and said he needed help laying the trail, so I volunteered. He said he had the whole thing scouted out, but when we got to the first beer check he said, "I know where we have to go, I'm just not sure how to get there." Turned out to be a pretty good trail. Lots of blood, fitting for a Halloween hash. Probably my last week as beermeister too, since I probably won't make it next week. Woohoo!

Off to see Galactic/Mofro/New Monsoon at Stubb's tonight! Should be a great show. Wish it weren't on a Monday, though, gotta stay somewhat sober on the school nights.

DOF, when I have more time I will certainly ridicule your latest post.

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Monte tonight

Damn, lots of hashers read this now. More on the Challenge when I get my computer back. We will probably do it again next year, so if anyone has any suggestions tell me or grabber. We will then make fun of you and your suggestions at the next Tues happy hour.

Couple 'o hashers (Trojan, Lewis, UnZip Me, Just Nicole) heading out to Nutty Brown tonight to see Monte Montgomery. Opening act at 8PM, Monte at 9:30PM, $8 cover. I'm taking a lot of heat after Keller Williams exploded on the acoustic guitar last week, Monte needs to be on his game tonight to quiet the critics!

I'm now co-haring tomorrow. UZM called today and said he had the general area for trail scouted out, but wanted me to go along to lay some really long falses. So use that extra hour tonight for sleep, you're gonna need to be rested up for tomorrow's trail!

Friday, October 28, 2005

asshole or bitch?

I am 58% Asshole/Bitch.
Sort of Assholy or Bitchy!
I am abrasive, some people really hate me, but there may be a group of other tight knit assholes and bitches that I can hang out with and get me. Everybody else? Fuck ‘em.

Thursday, October 27, 2005


Working on an August trip to Colorado. Will include climbing Long's Peak on a Tues or Wed, participating in the Pikes Peak climbs (I'll do the double, you can choose to do the Ascent or Marathon), and doing the incline on Monday. Of course, we'll visit the Denver, Fort Collins, and Pikes Peak hashes while we're there. Long's will be extremely difficult, both physically and logistically, but I have lots of friends who've done it so the planning will be a bit easier. Anyone interested in joining me for this trip get ahold of me.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005


Tried to go to a KKK rally at lunch today. No, not looking into membership, but there was supposed to be a group over at city hall pushing for passage of the upcoming marriage vote. Figured I might see a fight or something if I hung out over there. But there was nothing. No rally, no guys in white suits, nothing.

Running the Greenbelt after work today, then it's down to Town Lake for a memorial honoring the 2000 fallen Iraqi Freedon soldiers. Probably go for a beer afterwards so if anyone is interested give me a call around 9PM.

Picking up the Burnet Road Challenge shirts tomorrow, they look pretty good. Grabber and I hit four pubs last night (Poodle Dog, Lala's, Buddy's, and C. Hunt's) to tell 'em we're coming by. Poodle Dog is giving anyone with an official t-shirt on a .25 discount on Lone Star! Just drink 40 Lone Stars there and the shirt pays for itself! We're planning on having a toast to Crotch at Ginny's, with Jim Beam. Probably pass out cans of Lone Star for the Buddy's to Lala's leg, the longest section of the Challenge at 1.8 miles.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

BRC meeting tonight

Final BRC meeting tonight, announcements soon after. Please support dumb people doing dumb things by buying an official event t-shirt.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

short hash today

I'm hurting today. I can barely walk. I drove eight hours yesterday in a VW van to do a 30+ mile trail. I'm very happy to only have to drive to Georgetown today and trail will be less than ten miles.

Keller Williams

Went to the Keller Williams show last night. Amazing show! This guy's CDs just don't do him justice.

Keller Williams, not the house sales guy, is a great musician who plays all the instruments in the show. He'll lay down a bass riff, then record it onto a computer, then loop it. Same with the drums, keyboard, and whatever else he plays. Then he'll pick up an acoustic guitar and rock out. One of the best acoustic guitarists I've ever seen.

Played a lot of my favorite Keller stuff, including "gate crashers suck," and did some great covers of String Cheese, the Dead, and Bob Marley.

At one point I informed Social Retard (who is a HUGE Keller fan and had seen him in Dallas the night before), "Hey, this guy reminds me of Jack Black." She gave me a weird look and said, "No he doesent, you idiot, he's nothing like Jack Black." And wouldn't you know it, the very next song Keller played was a cover by Tenacious D! "I love you baby...But all I can think about is...Kielbassa sausage, your butt cheeks is warm!"

So, another great day in Austin. PR long run in the morning, great live show in the evening. Good times!

Rocky Raccoon

Great run yesterday up at Huntsville State Park, site of the Rocky Raccoon 50K. Ended up in 5th overall, four hours and 22 minutes, a PR for me by almost 25 minutes.

Started very conservatively. Wanted to pick it up a bit here as I was feeling pretty good, but the patience paid off. I was somewhere back towards the middle of the pack at the second aid station, then I decided it was time to start running. I might have run faster than anyone on the course for the next 15 miles. Hit the halfway point in 2:09, also a PR for me. Kept up the pace and moved into fourth place. Hit the second aid station on the last loop, and then reality hit me. Started cramping up pretty bad, one guy passed me, I was starting to think this day was going into the tank quickly. But I hung in there, and even though my pace slowed a bit I was still able to continue running. After about two miles of pain, and after taking some migrane strength excedrin, I got my second wind. Once again picked up the pace and was able to bring it home pretty strong.

Very happy with my time. This was my first time I was able to put together a complete 50K, in races past I had ended up walking a significant portion of the final few miles.

It was pretty funny, there I was about 100 yards from the finish line, slogging towards the end, looking like shit, and I hear someone say "Get your ass moving, wanker!" I look up and there is Choo Choo from the Houston hash, he had done the 25K. He was also one of the few who did the double ballbuster up in Toronto. Luckily I had brought along some St. Arnold's for post race recovery!

Up next: the Rocky Trails marathon on Nov 5, at Inks Lake State Park in Tyler. I'm up to the point now where I can say, "it's only 26 miles, I'll just do that and head out to the hash campout."

Friday, October 21, 2005

more pub run

So there I was, third thursday of the month, as usual in the parking lot of RunTex, drinking some St. Arnold's...

Another great pub run by the Austin Duathletes. Early on, in the parking lot, a newby to Austin was talking to Phil and I about duathlons. The guy asks Phil, who is the president of the AD, what workouts the club does. He replies, "Well, on the third thursday of the month we do the pub run, and on the first thursday of the month we do the booze cruise." What a great group!

Thanks to Melissa for all the presents in the parking lot! You're still a wanker for not doing the pub run, though. Good luck in your marathon this weekend.

Pretty good turnout. Several hashers. Lewis & Cock, High Beams, Tarantula, Squeeky Cheeks, Squeeze Box. Brrr wasn't here, so I was quite happy, but she ended up showing up later. Luckily I was able to avoid her most of the night.

From Runtex we were off to Darwin's pub on 6th street. A quick Fat Tire here and I try to round up the hashers for an extra stop to support the hash bar. Everyone but Lewis wanks out, you should all be disappointed in yourselves for skipping LJ's!

So to LJ's for an Iron City. From there it was off to Sholtz's beer garden in the shadow of UT stadium. Unfortunately, this joint was closed for a private party. Losers. Oh well, at least two of us had made up for the closed bar with an extra stop.

Next pub was Posse East, a beautiful dive on the corner of Duval and San Jacinto. Couple of Lone Stars here. I then saw Brrr doing sign language so I bolted to the next bar, all the way to...

...the Crown & Anchor! One of my favorite watering holes in Austin! Stayed a while here, had a few pints of Guinness. Tried to arm wrestle High Beams here but she pussed out.

Lewis and I decided it was time for another off-the-map bar, so it was off to Texas Showdown for more Lone Star. It was his first time in the joint, I think he likes it there.

Texas Showdown to Lavaca St. Pub for the final stop. Lots of drunks here. Regular runners don't drink very much, so they tend to get wasted on these pub runs. We were joined here by Nicole (who got a parking ticket!) and I even caught a glimpse of my favorite stalker, Jeannette. I had quite a few beers here, and my goal of staying relatively sober was destroyed.

All in all, another great Thursday night!

Well, gotta get back to busting nurses. I'll keep everyone posted on the next pub run.

pub run

If you weren't there, you missed an epic pub run last night! Runtex to Darwin's, to Lovejoy's (for the real hashers, anyways), to Posse East, to Crown & Anchor, to Texas Showdown (once again, for the real hashers), to Lavaca Street. Good times!

More details later, here are some pics:

Wednesday, October 19, 2005


Wow, I was not only tagged by Late Night Drive Through, but she has me as a link on her site! And since I love the DC area hashes (had a blast with some of them at IAH Austin and several other places) I'll try this out.

7 things I plan to do before I die:
1. Western States 100 mile trail run
2. Follow Widespread Panic on a summer tour
3. Get drunk at the Guinness brewery
4. Win the pot at chicken shit bingo and buy all of Ginny's a can of Schlitz
5. Visit the mother hash in KL
6. Climb Mt. McKinley
7. R2R2R Grand Canyon traverse

7 things I can do:
1. Quit drinking jager, anytime I want!
2. Run up Pikes Peak
3. Qualify for the Boston Marathon
4. Jump from a plane, the real way (AIRBORNE!)
5. Believe that Pitt, with a 2-3 record, will win the national championship this year.
6. Get shot at and not panic too much
7. Believe the Pirates will turn things around and contend for the world series title next season.

7 things I cannot do:
1. Autowank
2. Golf
3. Scuba dive
4. Consider Austin as part of Texas
5. Listen to country music
6. Drink light beer
7. Another term on the AH3 junta

7 things that attract me to the opposite sex:
1. Hourglass figure
2. Legs
3. Morally casual attitude
4. Women not telling me to get lost
5. Tequila drinkers
6. Morally casual attitude
7. Morally casual attitude

7 things I say most often:
1. Wanker!
2. You pussy!
3. on-on!
4. Sure, I'll still talk to you next hash weekend.
5. Rock out with your cock out!
6. I will never again drink jager!
7. This is the worst hash weekend ever!

7 celebrity crushes:
1. Gillian Anderson
2. Jen Love Hewitt
3. Sara Michelle Gellar
4. Sharon Stone (gotta love the PGH girl)
5. Brandi Chastain
6. Brooke Burke
7. Jessica Alba

7 tags: (do I have to do this? I only know four)
1. DOF
2. Squawkin' Little Midget Wanker Bitch
3. Raphael
4. Playsbyear

straights and curves and zax's

Today's workout was fairly easy. Runtex to the School for the Deaf for some "straights and curves," or what we used to call windsprints in high school. Short run due to Rocky this weekend. Was nice to open it up on the track though, it had been a while since I did that.

After the run both the Bandera and Freescale groups went over to Zax's. I usually go to Deep Eddy's on Wed for $2.50 Lone Star pitchers, but the Freescale group has quite a few hotties in it so I figured I'd head over there. Was drinking the Full Moon Coffee Stout, which was delicious, but at $4.50 a pint I damn near could have got two pitchers at Eddy's. And even with all of the women there, I still ended up bullshitting about Colorado running with some of the old Pikes Peak finishers. A buddy of mine had just returned from doing the Durango Double, and I may have to add that to my calendar next year. Great race, plus the race director is a hasher.

Worked out a game plan for Rocky this weekend. Should be able to set a PR as long as I don't tank in the last four or so miles, as I usually do. But I'm in a little better shape than I was when I did my last string of 50Ks, so we'll see. Supposed to be great weather.

Pub run tomorrow, looking forward to that. Especially the Posse East to Crown & Anchor leg. Should be quite a few people there. Funny that Timmy's girlfriend Brrrr and the rest of the hash has "discovered" this event and think it would be a good time. DOF, if you could take one for the team and make sure she doesn't show up I'd appreciate it. I never imagined she could be any more annoying, but now that she feels the need to do everything in sign language it's just more than I can take. Anyways, I don't have the heart to tell the rest of the hash that the pub run is a bit too physically demanding for most of the AH3 to be able to complete.

Brightleaf and Ginny's

Great run yesterday at Brightleaf State Park, located near 2222 and Mt. Bonnell Road. Not too many people know about this gem. Great trails, made better by the fact that I had to hop not one but two fenses marked "private property" to get there! The main trail is about a 3.5 mile loop, somewhat technical, just a little hilly. You definitely gotta pay attention or you'll be taking a dive. Parked at Melissa's house and ran to the park entrance to meet Grabber, ended up going an easy 40 minutes.

After the run it was off to Ginny's Little Longhorn for some post-run Schlitz. We said we were only going for one or two but that was a lie. We actually did leave somewhat early, probably close to nine, a very early Tuesday night for Grabber and I.

Got home a bit drunk and had my computer piss me off. If anyone knows what the hell is up with that piece of garbage please let me know. No, Fish, I'm not getting an Apple, unless you can get me one for free.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

BRC update

Ugh! I'm about to throw my computer at the drug dog next door! It's giving me shit, and mocking me, about my inability to log onto yahoo.

Oh well. For you readers of my blog, the big announcement is that the Burnet Road Challenge will start at C. Hunt's, not Draught Hourse. Mainly due to the parking situation, and the fact that C. Hunt's closes at midnight on Friday night. More info will be posted soon.

major announcement tonight

Woah, I figured out how to title my blogs! Woohoo, I'm a computer genius! Look out, Bill Gates, I'm commin' for you!

Anyways, major announcement concerning the Burnet Road Challenge coming tonight. Announcement will be made around 7:30PM at Ginny's and then posted here.

Monday, October 17, 2005

FYI, Burnet Challenge race directors have scheduled a meeting for tomorrow. We will be finalizing the t-shirt order, making a decision as to which direction the Challenge will be run, and drinking a lot of Lone Star.
October Pub Run Details!

Date: Thursday October 20th

Start Time: 6PM

Start Location: RunTex Riverside Annex

Distance: 5.5 miles

Pubs: In order of appearance

Darwin’s Pub
223 E. 6th St (512) 474-1335

Scholz Beer Garden
1607 San Jacinto Blvd (512) 474-1958

Posse East
2900 Duval St (512) 477-2111

Crown & Anchor Pub
2911 San Jacinto Blvd (512) 322-9168

Lavaca St. Bar
405 Lavaca St. (512) 469-0106

Course MAP

Questions/Concerns Issues:

Rules: Obey Traffic Signs & Signals

Bring $$$/ID/Shirt
So I finally get back from Bandera, tired as hell and just wanting to crawl into bed and sleep for a couple days straight, but as the beermeister I have no such luxury. Got back at 1PM, just enough time to toss my camping crap into the garage and toss the hash crap into my jeep. Hash elections are less than a month away now, and I'm counting the minutes. I'm actually burned out from having to go to the hash. I still love doing the trails, but the hour that I'll sit around before trail starts, and the hour I'll sit around after trail waiting for circle, all the while I'm usually dog tired from other weekend activities, just sucks. I used to enjoy it, I do like the folks in the hash and like bullshitting with them, but being required to be there changes everything. Oh well, it's almost over. Remember all you hashers, be nice to your beermeister, he's working his ass off!

Anyways, trail was up north which guaranteed a small turnout. DOF had an alright excuse but all the others were lazy and/or didn't like the hares and/or used whatever other lame excuse Austin hashers use. But the trail was fun. Never been to NE Metro Park, some good shiggy back there. Got some nasty cuts, crawled through some creeks, found a deer pelvis. I ended up walking most of the trail, sweeping with Divine Bovine, it was nice to see her again. Circle was pretty good too, with the smaller pack the RAs were better able to keep control of things. I think we named Just Jen, but I can't remember what we named her. Ass Biter, maybe?

After the hash I retired to the couch, popped open a 40 of Mickey's, and put in some concert footage of Primus. Was just gonna veg out, but then a bunch of yahoos showed up. Turned out to be a pretty fun night of drinking. Sat in the driveway, in the bed of a pickup, drinking from a keg, put away some vodka, got to oogle Ralphtard in her new OTR skirt. And no new holes in the wall! Good times!

Anyways, gotta finish my ham and cheese before bustin' some more nurses.
Went down to the Hill Country State Park in Bandera this past weekend. One of my favorite places in the world. Have to remind myself I'm still in Texas whenever I go down there, the hills and forest remind me more of Pennsylvania.

Arrived late Friday night and was able to set up camp with no flashlight, the full moon was so bright. Drank a few beers around the fire with the crew and then it was off to bed.

Up early the next morning, off on the trails before dawn. Great, great trails down there, and this was the first time in a while that the weather was cooperative. The course we had laid out was three different ten mile loops. Got to see all my old foes. Ice Cream Hill, Karin's Climb, the Big Nasty, the Three Sisters, Boyle's Bump. All kicked my ass as usual. But I was able to average about two hours per loop, pretty good for me. Sounds really slow, but if you've ever been to Bandera you'd understand.

So thirty miles, just over six hours, my ass thouroughly beaten, it was off to the Bandera Saloon to cool down and watch football! But the horror, the Bandera Saloon is no more. Closed down. It is for sale if anyone has a few extra bucks to toss around. But adapt and overcome, it was immediately off to the 11th Street Cowboy Bar for cold Lone Stars and some great grub from the Cowboy Capital Pizza joint. Yum yum, I downed almost an entire pizza while watching UT drub Colorado and keeping an eye on the ticker for the Pitt score (we really put it to South Florida! I'd also like to point out that PSU lost).

So this greasey pizza is still sitting in my gut like a rock when we arrive back at camp. Our coach then brings up the possibility of a night run. I know that pizza is gonna cause me problems, but I get all excited anyways. Night runs are awesome, and I had never really done a long one at Bandera. So around 9:30PM, we all take off. Bunch of slow people with me this weekend, so soon I'm alone. Doing the ten mile loop that included the Three Sisters and Ice Cream Hill, they were surprised to see me at night but they still kicked my ass. I did leave a little something behind on ICH, as I finally barfed up the pizza. Felt a lot better after that. Except for my puking, it was a beautiful night. The moon was so bright that I was able to turn off my flashlight at points. It was really cool getting to the top of a hill, you could see the entire park in the eerie glow of the moon. About two and a half hours later it was back to camp for more beers and then off to bed.

Up early once again, my body aching, ten more miles. Very, very slow, but I plodded along and finally finished.

Great weekend of running, my first good mileage weekend in a long time. Gives me a lot more confidence going into Rocky next weekend, and puts me back on track for Sunmart and the Bandera 100K.

Friday, October 14, 2005

Burnet Road Challenge Update

Race directors are currently discussing the possibility of switching direction of the Challenge, starting at C. Hunt's and going south from there. Rules prohibit us from making any decisions while not drinking beer. More info soon.
The Burnet Road Challenge (aka the "Drunkest Race in Texas")

When: Friday, Oct 28, 2005 Start Location: 6:00pm start time at the Draught Horse

Distance: 5.3 miles (if you stay on course)

Race Directors: Grabber and Brownie

Overview: The Burnet Road challenge is the premier road race in Central Texas. This is a Can't-Miss event for any serious runner who enjoys a social environment. The race combines the beautiful scenery of the historic Burnet Road district, while adding camaraderie at many of the fabled local pubs. Points of interest along the course include Ginny's Little Longhorn, Billy's Icehouse, The Poodle Dog Lounge, Billy's Tavern, LaLa's, and C Hunt's.

But wait - There's more!

Arrive early to guarantee your commerative t-shirt (designed by local Austin artists). The shirts will be available on a first-come first-serve basis at a nominal price.

Warning: Overzealousness in beer consumption and running speed may lead to the following conditions:
DNF due to leaving course early with a large chain-smoking gal.
Vomit stains. This applies to both the self-induced variety and the "overspray" variety.
Occasional stumbling and road rash
Misc events that you may not wish to remember.
Venereal disease

The organizers assume no responsibility for any risks including the above aforementioned (however we will, as applicable, laugh or join in)

Misc: Please bring your personal ChampionChip to the race. These will be good for smashing if adequate quantities of beer are consumed.
OK, figured I'd take this time to post, since I'm still on the clock. Thanks to all you Texans for paying your taxes, you make it possible to support my jager habit without actually having a real job.

Off to Bandera after work, Hill Country State Park. 30 mile run tomorrow morning, 20 mile run on Sunday morning. On some of the toughest trails in Texas too, it's gonna suck. Would try for 40 on Saturday, but I have the big Rocky Raccoon 50K next week and I'd like to be able to smoke that one.

My liver is glad it's not a hash weekend. In the past six weeks I've done Toronto, Austin City Limits, the Brenham/Houston campout, and Hashtoberfest, not to mention various pub runs and happy hours and keg exchanges and the vicious Burnet Road Challenge planning sessions. Of course, no trip to Bandera is complete without a visit to the Bandera Saloon and the 11th Street Cowboy Bar, but it's not gonna be quite the binge weekend I've been getting used to. Well, it is the UT/Colorado (and Pitt/South Florida, but I doubt that'll be televised down here) weekend, so you never know...

Will return for the Austin hash on Sunday. Williamson County, should be a turnout of about ten or so hounds.

Hope all you wankers have a great weekend!