"Hello Elites,
We hope that you're training is going well and can't wait to see you in a week! I'm working on finalizing your race weekend instructions and hope to get it out to you all by tomorrow evening. Thank you for your patience.
I am also working on updating bios for our press contacts. Can you please take a few minutes to send me the following information by Monday morning? I know it's short notice, but it would help us out a lot."
We hope that you're training is going well and can't wait to see you in a week! I'm working on finalizing your race weekend instructions and hope to get it out to you all by tomorrow evening. Thank you for your patience.
I am also working on updating bios for our press contacts. Can you please take a few minutes to send me the following information by Monday morning? I know it's short notice, but it would help us out a lot."
Notice that they called me elite! Of course, a few minutes later I got an e-mail apologizing, explaining that the e-mail wasn't supposed to go to me. But here's the info they were asking for anyways:
Name (First, "Nickname", Last): J "Mr. Elite" T
Date of Birth: 8/6/81
PR's from the last 2 years: 2:53 at NOLA while legally drunk
Birth City & Country: Nairobi, Kenya
Current City & Country: Old Colorado City, CO
Phone Number: don't have a phone, it interrupts training
Accomplishments/Notes about your athletic history that you'd like to share (Olympic Trials, All-American, other sports accomplishments, etc.): Recently ran sub 18:30 5k in Leadville, which is faster than either Galen Rupp or Chris Solinsky ran this weekend. Have taken down Brandon, GZ, Footfeathers, Stinky, Mike H, and Gerald this season. Who is gonna be next?
Any interesting facts/hobbies/notes that you'd like to share?: I enjoy drinking beer.
Date of Birth: 8/6/81
PR's from the last 2 years: 2:53 at NOLA while legally drunk
Birth City & Country: Nairobi, Kenya
Current City & Country: Old Colorado City, CO
Phone Number: don't have a phone, it interrupts training
Accomplishments/Notes about your athletic history that you'd like to share (Olympic Trials, All-American, other sports accomplishments, etc.): Recently ran sub 18:30 5k in Leadville, which is faster than either Galen Rupp or Chris Solinsky ran this weekend. Have taken down Brandon, GZ, Footfeathers, Stinky, Mike H, and Gerald this season. Who is gonna be next?
Any interesting facts/hobbies/notes that you'd like to share?: I enjoy drinking beer.
7 comments:
Accomplishments: You also used the bathroom at the home of 2nd place age division winner at WS100, took a trekking pole from someone who couldn't even breathe for your own use, gave your last disgusting espresso gel to a competitor in the heat of battle (me at CP50).
Really, you sell yourself short and should tell that race to go straight to hell for not allowing you to start in your own elite wave one minute before the wannabes.
I actually think you need to include your aid station antics in your resume.
No Usain Bolt pose photo to go along Mr. Knob-cheese?
Sounds like someone is jealous of the new elite guy.
The Bolt pose will come out after I cross the finish line...
That email acknowledgement alone should be more than enough evidence for a comped Ultra Race of Champions Elite entry.
Nice.
Did you really take away a pole from a racer while pacing? That is just low.
I don't have anything clever to add, but this is one of the funniest posts you've written.
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