A new wave of animal cruelty has the ASPCA up in arms.
On the first day of this new year a lion was found viciously mauled. A week later, a bengal tiger was discovered horribly beaten. While the lion only had flesh wounds, the tiger appears to have been suffering regular beatings for years.
Just seven days after that, a colt was found battered. People at the scene said it kept muttering something about not getting enough protection.
Hours ago, Denver authorities found another horse, this time a bronco, wandering the streets. The horse was not physically injured, but quite dazed and confused. When asked about the incident, the hapless horse said "I was at home and everything was fine. I was about to feed my pet snake when he started choking and screaming about some sort of terrible towel following him around."
Rumor has it that the next target will be some sort of bird, possibly a seahawk.
All of the victims report trying to peek behind a giant steel curtain shortly before their incidents. As a result, the following warning has been issued to all animals: Peek behind a steel curtain, get hit by a BUS.
3 comments:
Is this Brownie actually being creative or did he cut and paste this from somewhere?
Cut and paste. If I had done it myself there would have been lots of raping of cheerleaders.
He cut and pastd from the email I sent.
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