Question:

You are driving in a car at a constant speed. On your left side is a
valley, and on your right side is a fire engine traveling at the
same speed as you. In front of you is a galloping pig which is the
same size as your car and you cannot overtake it. Behind you is a
helicopter flying at ground level. Both the giant pig and the helicopter are traveling at the same speed as you.

What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?









Answer:
Get off the children's merry-go-round. You're drunk.

Go Bucs!

The Pirates have won four in a row and are the hottest team in baseball!

Boulder H3

Made the trip up north today for my first ever Boulder hash. Easy trail, but I did finally get to see Colfax Ave in the daytime (yes, the Boulder hash was in Denver). Slut's shirt had a good time too.

weekend runs

Last hard weekend before the Pikes races, and I made it count.

On Saturday morning I met up with a CRUD buddy and we had a great run. Started at Elk Park, elevation 11,800 feet. Ran down an incredibly beautiful trail to Barr Camp at 10,200 feet. From there we did the six mile summit to Pikes via the Barr trail (my 5th summit of Pikes since I moved here). Then we did the same route back to the car. 24 miles of hard, technical trail running, all above 10,200 feet! Woohoo! Got some awesome views of Pikes and the surrounding mountains along the Barr to Elk Park trail too.

Still managed to hit the Pikes Peak hash that afternoon too!

Legs were shot on Sunday morning, but I still managed a hike up the incline before heading up to the Boulder hash.

CRUD barbeque

My running buddy Eric is moving back to Atlanta soon, and last night we had a CRUD gathering for him. During his "speech" he came up with this nugget of wisdom:

"Never let a poor performance get in the way of talking shit."

Great words to live by!

Now it's off for an Elk Creek Park/Barr Camp/Pikes summit run. 24 miles, lots of hills, all trail, all above 10,200 feet. Woohoo!

why Pikes?

If you can ignore the annoying team in training ad, a good article in the latest Runner's world about the Pikes Peak races. They mention the Arkansas contingent, but I think the Austin crew will overtake them, both in numbers and obnoxiousness, this year. The article is here.

Loved this quote from local hero Matt Carpenter, talking about the race as it rises above treeline at 12,000 feet:

"This mile alone has crushed the dreams of many runners. From here on up it is about wanting to get to the top. If that means running--awesome. If that means walking--super. If that means crawling--do it. Just keep moving!"

Hopefully Matt won't embarass me by testing positive for steroids this year.

like a bad rash...

...brownie never really goes away!

bite me

words of wisdom

"There's only one rule: The guy who trains the hardest, the most, wins. Period. Because you won't die. Even though you feel like you'll die, you don't actually die. Like when you're training, you can always do one more. Always. As tired as you might think you are, you can always, always do one more."

-Floyd Landis

intellectual whores

Great stuff, and it completely describes my behavior! Unfortunately, most of my time is spent in the abyss...

ladder theory

Invihash Roll Call

Which of my loyal readers are going to Colorado Invihash? I have e-mails to send out. I'm also looking at putting together a dodge ball team for the event, so let me know if you're interested.

Welcome to Colorado!

Colorado welcomes it's newest resident, Melissa! She's spending her final hours as a Texan today before making the drive to the second coolest state in the country (besides PA, of course).

FRB's

Me and Free Bus(c)h drinking for FRBing at the military hash. Though she wasn't wearing any military apparell she made an acceptable barracks whore.

overheard at work today...

Me: So what have you been up to? Chasin' women? Partying?

Parolee: No, I've been busy watching Jews die on TV.

shirted!

Another great time at Jack Quinn's Running Club. Finally got my shirt too! Tuesday marked the fourth day in a row I did some kind of organized drink/run event. Kimchi hash, Denver hash, DIM hash, and JQ's. I'll try to hit the CO Running Company happy hour tonight but I think I gotta work late.

brass monkey...that funky monkey!

Beers and Mt. Bierstadt

Bagged 14er #6 today, Mount Bierstadt. Good times, had a couple 'o other hashers along for the trip as well as a vacationing Hill Country Trail Runner. Finished with enough spunk to get to the Denver hash and show those Air Force desk jockeys that they can't hang with the Infantry!

I'll post a report later, once I've finally caught up on sleep (camped out at 11,700 feet on Sat, after drinking with the Kimchi's, so I'm pretty tired).

Until then, pics are here.

DH3

Me and Boobs, at the Denver Military Hash, telling the rest of the world where it's priorities should be.

Kinfolks

Celebrating my Barr Trail Mountain Race at Kinfolk's in Manitou Springs.

for Smut...

Aww, puppy dogs! Chicks love puppy dogs, right?

Anyways, these two poor dogs are now at the center of a huge controversy in the Springs. The far left fringe and the far right fringe are up in arms, and the amount of noise those two groups are making causes the politicians to play along. Meanwhile, the middle 98% of us are left to wonder, "aren't there more important things to worry about?"

The left and right links are pretty funny. Especially since the big gay football player is named Dan and resembles Chlamydia. Coincidence?

overheard at work today...

Me: So how've you been?

Parolee: Good. I've been clean and sober for a week now.

Me: Really? This says you tested positive for coke on Tuesday.

Parolee: Oh. Well, it's been almost a week...